http://tanyadavis.ca/blog.cfm Tue, 01 May 2012 21:36:24 GMT http://bandzoogle.com http://tanyadavis.ca/blog.cfm?feature=1831197&postid=2036532 On a spring day in Halifax, I sit on my back porch with my cat nearby my to-do list is long but most of it is checked off I have left the funnest things for the last minute which is unusual how great that today, instead of booking airplane tickets and shuffling papers, I, instead, get to go buy a german phrasebook and a novel for bookclub I will bring these things on the plane I am to Germany! In a few hours! Oh, but I have not packed yet. Oops. My motorcyle is running and insured and in my driveway. It looks really good and sounds reasonable. I am in love with it. My bicycle also looks good and I am in love with that, too. I am in love with a lot of things. I have spring fever Or else it is always this way. I think it is always this way. In Germany I will drink too much beer.  Well, too much if measured against glasses of fresh squeezed juice, which I will probably not consumme enough of. But just the right amount of beer for flavour and light-headedness after shows and curiosity for new flavours. i will also eat too much cake! At a superduper dinner party the other night a friend said the Germans are good at cake. I will also be to Denmark for one day and Iceland for one day and England for 7 days.  Every time I write a blog post I do so in a spastic hyper mood and I don't know what to focus on, so I end up writing a list Here is my list for today: Gratitude for -  people 7 second (or longer) hugs flirting the strangers I haven't met yet the opportunity to be Halifax's poet laureate the chance to say goodbye the vegetables I recently ate (may you sustain me through beer and cake, vegetables!) dates when Halifax says things out loud, when Canada says things out loud political agitators boat-rockers lovers dance parties Hey, Germany, will you dance with me?! because on friday there is a house party in Halifax where friends and lovers of mine will celebrate and move and grind and they'll all be having a time and, sadly, I will miss it but the thing is with this touring business i pick up other adventures in the places I visit but on this coming friday night if I do feel listless will you grab my waist and grip my hips and spin me shake with me on a floor make me forget the reasons we are here for or else remember them it's for love, yes? yes. xo t my to-do list is long but most of it is checked off
I have left the funnest things for the last minute
which is unusual
how great that today, instead of booking airplane tickets and shuffling papers, I, instead, get to go buy a german phrasebook
and a novel for bookclub
I will bring these things on the plane
I am to Germany! In a few hours!

Oh, but I have not packed yet. Oops.

My motorcyle is running and insured and in my driveway. It looks really good and sounds reasonable. I am in love with it.
My bicycle also looks good and I am in love with that, too.
I am in love with a lot of things.
I have spring fever
Or else it is always this way. I think it is always this way.

In Germany I will drink too much beer. 
Well, too much if measured against glasses of fresh squeezed juice, which I will probably not consumme enough of.
But just the right amount of beer for flavour and light-headedness after shows and curiosity for new flavours.
i will also eat too much cake!

At a superduper dinner party the other night a friend said the Germans are good at cake.

I will also be to Denmark for one day and Iceland for one day and England for 7 days. 

Every time I write a blog post I do so in a spastic hyper mood and I don't know what to focus on, so I end up writing a list
Here is my list for today:

Gratitude for - 
people
7 second (or longer) hugs
flirting
the strangers I haven't met yet
the opportunity to be Halifax's poet laureate
the chance to say goodbye
the vegetables I recently ate (may you sustain me through beer and cake, vegetables!)
dates
when Halifax says things out loud, when Canada says things out loud
political agitators
boat-rockers
lovers
dance parties

Hey, Germany, will you dance with me?!
because on friday there is a house party in Halifax where friends and lovers of mine will celebrate and move and grind
and they'll all be having a time
and, sadly, I will miss it
but the thing is
with this touring business
i pick up other adventures in the places I visit
but on this coming friday night
if I do feel listless
will you grab my waist and grip my hips
and spin me
shake with me on a floor
make me forget the reasons we are here for
or else remember them
it's for love, yes?

yes.

xo
t



]]> Tue, 01 May 2012 21:36:24 GMT 844E933146D0E021BA6AD9657866C777 http://tanyadavis.ca/blog.cfm?feature=1831197&postid=1851972  Ah..... Mexico! Mexico Mexico Mexico. I am in love with Mexico. And people and poets and mezcal and rancheros and limes and dancing and love. Just got home to snow dusted Halifax two days ago.  I was only in Mexico for one week but it felt like much much more. Maybe that is because IT IS AMAZING THERE! and time seemed to go slow, or else i went slowly through it. can't tell, doesn't matter. Enclave Festival brought me there. Poetry brought me there. Thank you, poetry and people who bring poets together under umbrellas of festivals and workshops and sharing. This morning in Canada I went to speak in a library at a local college. I drank the punch, though it had no fresh limes in it. I glowed a little bit about Mexico and there are a lot of reasons why. For instance: avocados the oldest most beautiful buildings I have ever seen heat and sun and shade-y places to drink your cerveza and watch the people leather and denim food, everywhere, in the open air without inspections or uptight bylaws people, everywhere, in the open air eating the food and talking to each other and communing plazas, large ones, open air, more open air and people communing in it traffic that seems crazy but somehow works motorcycles that weave through like talented embroiderers, making pretty and dangerous patterns pedestrians who know how to cross the road spanish language and spanish-speaking poets playing with spanish language and all of it's r's rolling mezcal the crazy mezcal-fuelled house party, the dancing people, the shirtless hombres, the flirtation, the zest driving around empty Colima streets late at night with artists and an open bottle (ssshhh.. don't tell. The Canadian in me loved this reckless moment) my new friends, from Mexico, Guatemala, Germany, Chile, USA the ocean in Manzanillo, the waves so big we could only flirt with them, the bashing that happened when I went out too far the ceviche the oysters on the beach that PEI-ers would have approved of the discomfort of not speaking the language and how it was to feel outside in this way the moments of connection that existed without the language of words (dancing, laughter, eye contact, tears) my newfound and pressing desire to learn Spanish, so I can talk to more people in the world, and hear their poems poems, even when i don't understand them poets These are some things I loved there are more, of course But language can't say it, can explore it, can't claim it How grateful I am, up here in Halifax, to have been there, in Mexico, and for poetry. Poets all over the world, living and watching. I feel cracked open. I don't quite know what that means.. but parts are dribbling out of me things I once believed and those I never did made some room so as to let Mexico in Oh, my pounding heart. how I love to love this world,  t I am in love with Mexico. And people and poets and mezcal and rancheros and limes and dancing and love.

Just got home to snow dusted Halifax two days ago. 
I was only in Mexico for one week but it felt like much much more. Maybe that is because IT IS AMAZING THERE!
and time seemed to go slow, or else i went slowly through it.
can't tell, doesn't matter.

Enclave Festival brought me there. Poetry brought me there. Thank you, poetry and people who bring poets together under umbrellas of festivals and workshops and sharing.
This morning in Canada I went to speak in a library at a local college. I drank the punch, though it had no fresh limes in it. I glowed a little bit about Mexico and there are a lot of reasons why.

For instance: avocados
the oldest most beautiful buildings I have ever seen
heat and sun and shade-y places to drink your cerveza and watch the people
leather and denim
food, everywhere, in the open air without inspections or uptight bylaws
people, everywhere, in the open air eating the food and talking to each other and communing
plazas, large ones, open air, more open air and people communing in it
traffic that seems crazy but somehow works
motorcycles that weave through like talented embroiderers, making pretty and dangerous patterns
pedestrians who know how to cross the road
spanish language and spanish-speaking poets playing with spanish language and all of it's r's rolling
mezcal
the crazy mezcal-fuelled house party, the dancing people, the shirtless hombres, the flirtation, the zest
driving around empty Colima streets late at night with artists and an open bottle (ssshhh.. don't tell. The Canadian in me loved this reckless moment)
my new friends, from Mexico, Guatemala, Germany, Chile, USA
the ocean in Manzanillo, the waves so big we could only flirt with them, the bashing that happened when I went out too far
the ceviche
the oysters on the beach that PEI-ers would have approved of
the discomfort of not speaking the language and how it was to feel outside in this way
the moments of connection that existed without the language of words (dancing, laughter, eye contact, tears)
my newfound and pressing desire to learn Spanish, so I can talk to more people in the world, and hear their poems
poems, even when i don't understand them
poets


These are some things I loved
there are more, of course
But language can't say it, can explore it, can't claim it

How grateful I am, up here in Halifax, to have been there, in Mexico, and for poetry.
Poets all over the world, living and watching.
I feel cracked open. I don't quite know what that means.. but parts are dribbling out of me
things I once believed
and those I never did
made some room so as to let Mexico in

Oh, my pounding heart.

how I love to love this world, 
t

]]> Fri, 09 Mar 2012 02:10:55 GMT 3712404E8AC56FE9D46C9171A88D4B8B http://tanyadavis.ca/blog.cfm?feature=1831197&postid=1755978  Some weeks are more about doing poetry than writing it. Having it? LIving it? Sponging it up and sitting in it? I am having one of those weeks. Though I did move ahead at least 2 stanzas on 2 different poems I am trying to finish for upcoming performances. And I've been reading my new Billy Collins book... Productivity is a farce. Still, I strive for it anyway. And so, accomplished this week (thus far...): Serious brainstorm time into what to wear to this weekend's TEXTURE themed dance party and what sort of touches I will garner while in my chosen texture A cabin booked for February's west coast writing retreat weekend (well, actually, i totally didn't do that, my friend Mary did. But I got to OK it) Successful first attempt at braised short ribs Accumulation of new sheet music for the piano! Much pondering over how to use my accumulated air miles that I got thanks to accumulated visa debt - upcoming trip to Mexico City for poetry festival or some future dream trip to Japan. Pondering is not exactly accomplishing but it is productive (?) Love and dating A very great show at the In the Dead of Winter Music Festival with a drummer and a slew of new songs, vulnerable and raw for my hometown crowd Safe bicycle riding in the snow Random speaking engagements booked for months down the road That is the kind of week I'm having Well, there's other things, too. Things like secrets. Also, lustful things, private things. Things you might want to hear but I'm not going to type them today. Also, I have done a lot of thinking. And I made myself sit at my desk many times, though my feet twitched and my knees bumped together and my cat reeaaaally wanted me to get up. And I watched some Halifax poets perform, their hearts exposed through personal words in a bar on a stage for acquaintances and strangers. I also finally spent that gift certificate I was given for the big Indigo Book store, speaking of acquaintances. On sunday I was on a date in a cafe. The people at the next table were familiar faces, we struck up a conversation, soon we were making arrangements for shared transportation 'Let's go spend our gift cards!' So, I spent a few hours at the mall and came home with a few books and two new friends. Now, THAT is the kind of productivity I feel good about. Coming soon: I learn how to post new pictures and poems on my website Also, news of winter/spring touring to other countries! I hope you see something gorgeous today there is always something gorgeous td Having it? LIving it? Sponging it up and sitting in it?

I am having one of those weeks.
Though I did move ahead at least 2 stanzas on 2 different poems I am trying to finish for upcoming performances. And I've been reading my new Billy Collins book...

Productivity is a farce. Still, I strive for it anyway.
And so, accomplished this week (thus far...):

Serious brainstorm time into what to wear to this weekend's TEXTURE themed dance party and what sort of touches I will garner while in my chosen texture
A cabin booked for February's west coast writing retreat weekend (well, actually, i totally didn't do that, my friend Mary did. But I got to OK it)
Successful first attempt at braised short ribs
Accumulation of new sheet music for the piano!
Much pondering over how to use my accumulated air miles that I got thanks to accumulated visa debt - upcoming trip to Mexico City for poetry festival or some future dream trip to Japan. Pondering is not exactly accomplishing but it is productive (?)
Love and dating
A very great show at the In the Dead of Winter Music Festival with a drummer and a slew of new songs, vulnerable and raw for my hometown crowd
Safe bicycle riding in the snow
Random speaking engagements booked for months down the road

That is the kind of week I'm having
Well, there's other things, too.
Things like secrets. Also, lustful things, private things. Things you might want to hear but I'm not going to type them today.
Also, I have done a lot of thinking.
And I made myself sit at my desk many times, though my feet twitched and my knees bumped together and my cat reeaaaally wanted me to get up.
And I watched some Halifax poets perform, their hearts exposed through personal words in a bar on a stage for acquaintances and strangers.
I also finally spent that gift certificate I was given for the big Indigo Book store, speaking of acquaintances.

On sunday I was on a date in a cafe.
The people at the next table were familiar faces, we struck up a conversation, soon we were making arrangements for shared transportation
'Let's go spend our gift cards!'
So, I spent a few hours at the mall and came home with a few books and two new friends.
Now, THAT is the kind of productivity I feel good about.

Coming soon: I learn how to post new pictures and poems on my website
Also, news of winter/spring touring to other countries!

I hope you see something gorgeous today
there is always something gorgeous

td


]]> Fri, 03 Feb 2012 03:28:30 GMT F56A5AE3A6E633D074C77360ED6160E4 http://tanyadavis.ca/blog.cfm?feature=1831197&postid=1648894 Holidays! Christmess! I am in a PEI cafe. Last night was my last show of 2011 and I am friggin excited for a much needed vacation. Happy Solstice everybody! To celebrate, I will gather around a fire with farmers and spinsters, draft-dodgers and hippies, mothers and children, government employees, teachers and unemployed-ees, artists and wanderers, lovers and friends, pagans and christians. We will welcome the return of the sun and I will celebrate a marvellous year. Thank you for all of your support and love. I feel it. I FEEL IT! I have so much to update on this website of mine.  I have written new poems. I have vinyl available now and my books  and some show dates in western canada and also in UK this winter and spring and i have ideas! lots of them and collaborations in progress and some very lofty plans... thing is, I always get around to updating my website eventually, but it is, admittedly, not the top priority. But I will try harder! I will. for now, just a happy holidays from me, from this pei cafe and gratitude for this good year i've had, the opportunities within it, the people i've met, the places i've visited. i feel fatigued and satisfied. and in love with a lot of things and people. thank you for your continued support (ha, I sound like a small business. well, i guess i am) more soon from me but first, holidays xo t
Holidays! Christmess!

I am in a PEI cafe. Last night was my last show of 2011 and I am friggin excited for a much needed vacation. Happy Solstice everybody! To celebrate, I will gather around a fire with farmers and spinsters, draft-dodgers and hippies, mothers and children, government employees, teachers and unemployed-ees, artists and wanderers, lovers and friends, pagans and christians. We will welcome the return of the sun and I will celebrate a marvellous year. Thank you for all of your support and love. I feel it. I FEEL IT!

I have so much to update on this website of mine. 
I have written new poems.
I have vinyl available now
and my books 
and some show dates in western canada and also in UK this winter and spring

and i have ideas! lots of them
and collaborations in progress
and some very lofty plans...

thing is, I always get around to updating my website eventually, but it is, admittedly, not the top priority. But I will try harder! I will.

for now, just a happy holidays from me, from this pei cafe
and gratitude for this good year i've had, the opportunities within it, the people i've met, the places i've visited.
i feel fatigued and satisfied.
and in love with a lot of things and people.

thank you for your continued support (ha, I sound like a small business. well, i guess i am)

more soon from me
but first, holidays

xo
t

]]> Thu, 22 Dec 2011 23:40:09 GMT 7AFF7260C7D2A8B0B6CFA3296CCC4106 http://tanyadavis.ca/blog.cfm?feature=1831197&postid=1574058  Hellooooooooo Blog, people reading it, I kept thinking about you, across Canada, in North Carolina, in small villages in Labrador.. Now I am in Ottawa with a morning all to myself and my computer and i am consuming large quantities of coffee and away we go! It's snowing here. It was snowing a lot in Labrador, where I just was for 8 days, teaching a lot of poetry workshops to kids of all ages. I was there as a part of the Labrador Creative Arts Festival. What an amazing experience. And intense. I tell people sometimes in my workshops that I am no teacher. I am an artist and I'm there to talk about what I do and to (hopefully) open up a room and make some space, facilitate some safety in which to create. Workshops make me nervous, as does the stage But workshops make me MORE nervous. Some Labrador highlights: flying in one of those teeny weeny planes to a small innu community up the coast being greeted on a gravel runway by a large fluffy dog late night snow walks no streetlights  boots on snow become beautiful percussion flirting (ha, that will always be a highlight, FYI) moose, arctic char, mustard pickles, innu donuts, redberries, pea soup the most expensive slippers I have ever purchased amazing kids opening up to the possibility of poetry dancing at the local 'club' massage party in the basement of my billet's house sleeping the last night on a futon with 4 amazing people, peas in a pod, cuddle puddle Before Labrador I was home for a few weeks, working away in my office and cleaning my house and before that I was in a lot of other different places Highlights: being recognized in North Carolina for 'How to be Alone' and, consequently, making a new and beautiful friend 4 days at the Banff Centre for the Arts writing poems in front of mountains and eating too much at the buffet dancing, many places Oh, I think there are lots of highlights but I can't remember them all now I need to not leave such large gaps in between blogs... I am sidetracked - I've been thinking about my country's government. And how atrocious it is. Stephen Harper and the conservatives 'rebranding' our gov't, so that on paper it is called The Harper Government instead of the Gov't of Canada. WHAT THE FUCK?!?! While he tries to pass a new crime bill that will put more vulnerable people in prisons instead of giving them actual help And, meanwhile, the momentum of the occupy movement continues to inspire me.  And I think of ways to help. What can I occupy? Lines on paper, moments on stage? How can I make this count? I also am part of the 99% People are amazing, working hard to change in the face of such adversity, gov'ts that work hard to crush us, banks and people so greedy they can't even see how much they're consuming. These days are interesting.  I tour around while people sleep in parks, in prisons.  Here on this snowy Ottawa morning I am opening, listening. I will write poems while people protest our conditions, our conditioning. I remain optimistic and do my best to contribute. Our world is crying, it is beautiful, what will we do? td
Blog, people reading it, I kept thinking about you, across Canada, in North Carolina, in small villages in Labrador..
Now I am in Ottawa with a morning all to myself and my computer and i am consuming large quantities of coffee and away we go!

It's snowing here.
It was snowing a lot in Labrador, where I just was for 8 days, teaching a lot of poetry workshops to kids of all ages. I was there as a part of the Labrador Creative Arts Festival. What an amazing experience. And intense.
I tell people sometimes in my workshops that I am no teacher. I am an artist and I'm there to talk about what I do and to (hopefully) open up a room and make some space, facilitate some safety in which to create.
Workshops make me nervous, as does the stage
But workshops make me MORE nervous.

Some Labrador highlights:

flying in one of those teeny weeny planes to a small innu community up the coast
being greeted on a gravel runway by a large fluffy dog
late night snow walks no streetlights 
boots on snow become beautiful percussion
flirting (ha, that will always be a highlight, FYI)
moose, arctic char, mustard pickles, innu donuts, redberries, pea soup
the most expensive slippers I have ever purchased
amazing kids opening up to the possibility of poetry
dancing at the local 'club'
massage party in the basement of my billet's house
sleeping the last night on a futon with 4 amazing people, peas in a pod, cuddle puddle

Before Labrador I was home for a few weeks, working away in my office and cleaning my house and before that I was in a lot of other different places
Highlights:

being recognized in North Carolina for 'How to be Alone' and, consequently, making a new and beautiful friend
4 days at the Banff Centre for the Arts writing poems in front of mountains and eating too much at the buffet
dancing, many places

Oh, I think there are lots of highlights but I can't remember them all now
I need to not leave such large gaps in between blogs...

I am sidetracked - I've been thinking about my country's government. And how atrocious it is.
Stephen Harper and the conservatives 'rebranding' our gov't, so that on paper it is called The Harper Government instead of the Gov't of Canada.
WHAT THE FUCK?!?!
While he tries to pass a new crime bill that will put more vulnerable people in prisons instead of giving them actual help
And, meanwhile, the momentum of the occupy movement continues to inspire me. 
And I think of ways to help. What can I occupy? Lines on paper, moments on stage? How can I make this count? I also am part of the 99%
People are amazing, working hard to change in the face of such adversity, gov'ts that work hard to crush us, banks and people so greedy they can't even see how much they're consuming.

These days are interesting. 
I tour around while people sleep in parks, in prisons. 
Here on this snowy Ottawa morning I am opening, listening.
I will write poems while people protest our conditions, our conditioning.
I remain optimistic and do my best to contribute.
Our world is crying, it is beautiful, what will we do?

td


]]> Fri, 02 Dec 2011 23:34:47 GMT FFE6FCD639F0F08071108966E230DCA9 http://tanyadavis.ca/blog.cfm?feature=1831197&postid=1361442 Hey, it became fall! I think of this blog from time to time when I am not in front of a computer. But this morning I thought of it whilst in front of my computer hey, email, move over it's time to spit words out to nowhere I am about to head off on tour again. To far away Canadian cities like Edmonton and Calgary and Vancouver but also for a few days in Banff, mountain land! I will be hanging out with writers a lot! Writers who are famous and have a lot of books published This makes me excited, a bit nervous Some days I question my authenticity, as a writer. Usually that happens when I have gotten to do nothing but administration all week, planning logistics maks me feel weak meek and without the kind of discipline that writing takes. I remedied my most recent bout of am-i-a-real-writer's angst by a day on a country road, throughout which no other human beings were visible coffee beans and scribbles cat on my lap purring to heal, so subtle down in the musty basement for loud drumming make me the lady i want to date make more big my muscles there was a piano, tried, true and trusted there were poems with no goal other than existance songs aching to live again so i played them i drank coffee enough to make me crazy so then i made tea i spent a day alone in the country to remember me Of course, country days fade away into city nights and now I'm back in Halifax trying to organize my life Seeking balance between create and administer Where is my manager? Oh, ya, I don't have one Ok then, applications, let me fill you out ok, schedule, let me organize you somehow hey, time management skills, don't fail me now Often, I get in conversation with my artistic self-employed peers about our love and all of our striving and our fears what we're alive for, why are we here at the end of every conversation it is, for me, the same thing here to live, here to be do our work and connect with human beings be a part of the world, part of the journey to peace in america they are occupying wall street this has more poetry than the financial district has ever seen may the buildings smirk to each other, sideways 'we knew they'd come, see' i am making plans to retreat with a friend next to the ocean and write words and lines that will become poems and this won't happen until deep winter but i hold it now and feel consoled here are some moments i have recently been in love with: purring cat against my ear for medicine motorcyle down the highway to feel independent dancing on wood floors in barns at weddings kisses on stoops and understars and in kitchens pulling from the wicker basket my collection of mittens trips to value village my grandmother's party when she turned 85 a swim in the ocean when the sun began to say goodnight my sister who bakes me cookies, treats me gently when i cry hugs from friends from old and far away hugs from new connections on lots of days the option of connection that i always try to take the ones that have my back, my interests at heart those who have held down roots for me since the very start the truth, for me, no matter joy or pain, always being the best part that is all, for now td
I think of this blog from time to time when I am not in front of a computer. But this morning I thought of it whilst in front of my computer
hey, email, move over
it's time to spit words out to nowhere

I am about to head off on tour again. To far away Canadian cities like Edmonton and Calgary and Vancouver
but also for a few days in Banff, mountain land! I will be hanging out with writers a lot! Writers who are famous and have a lot of books published
This makes me excited, a bit nervous
Some days I question my authenticity, as a writer. Usually that happens when I have gotten to do nothing but administration all week,
planning logistics maks me feel weak
meek and without the kind of discipline that writing takes.

I remedied my most recent bout of am-i-a-real-writer's angst
by a day on a country road, throughout which no other human beings were visible
coffee beans and scribbles
cat on my lap purring to heal, so subtle
down in the musty basement for loud drumming
make me the lady i want to date
make more big my muscles
there was a piano, tried, true and trusted
there were poems with no goal other than existance
songs aching to live again
so i played them
i drank coffee enough to make me crazy
so then i made tea
i spent a day alone in the country
to remember me

Of course, country days fade away into city nights and now I'm back in Halifax trying to organize my life
Seeking balance between create and administer
Where is my manager?
Oh, ya, I don't have one
Ok then, applications, let me fill you out
ok, schedule, let me organize you somehow
hey, time management skills, don't fail me now

Often, I get in conversation with my artistic self-employed peers
about our love and all of our striving and our fears
what we're alive for, why are we here

at the end of every conversation it is, for me, the same thing
here to live, here to be
do our work and connect with human beings
be a part of the world, part of the journey to peace
in america they are occupying wall street
this has more poetry
than the financial district has ever seen
may the buildings smirk to each other, sideways
'we knew they'd come, see'

i am making plans to retreat with a friend next to the ocean
and write words and lines that will become poems
and this won't happen until deep winter but i hold it now and feel consoled

here are some moments i have recently been in love with:

purring cat against my ear for medicine
motorcyle down the highway to feel independent
dancing on wood floors in barns at weddings

kisses on stoops and understars and in kitchens
pulling from the wicker basket my collection of mittens
trips to value village

my grandmother's party when she turned 85
a swim in the ocean when the sun began to say goodnight
my sister who bakes me cookies, treats me gently when i cry

hugs from friends from old and far away
hugs from new connections on lots of days
the option of connection that i always try to take

the ones that have my back, my interests at heart
those who have held down roots for me since the very start
the truth, for me, no matter joy or pain, always being the best part

that is all, for now
td

]]> Tue, 04 Oct 2011 22:07:53 GMT B34CDF8B0BD5B017F2956B5B01057F44 http://tanyadavis.ca/blog.cfm?feature=1831197&postid=1253882 There has not been much time for blogging I've been on my motorcycle i've been in bodies of water I've even been on dates under moons, on bicycles, in tents. It's a good summer... It's not like last summer, when Jack Layton was still alive and my heart arrythmia was recently fixed and how to be alone was getting lots of youtube hits back in 2010 when the sun shone hotter and we all stayed in the water longer but this summer is more real there's more grit it's more east coast than BC more scraggly bush than tall tall tree And i've been writing Fragments about religion and women new poems about work and witches songs about the lonely days that linger on This fall I will go to the west coast, for writers festivals and to eat salmon I will sit in my first hot spring, goddamn it I am planning this I also get to go to Carolina! Do you live in Carolina? Who lives in Carolina? I will be tootling around with some industry peeps, showcasing and inquiring into where are the good coffee shops and I-know-none-of-the-locals-are-swimming-but-i-am-from-canada-and-so-this-is-like-the-tropics-and-where-is-the-quarry? i will also do these things: pick berries make soup ride my bicycle ride my moto with a scarve that blows in the wind sew old cheap dresses into new, weird ones go on more dates write more poems play the piano that sounds so honky tonk it's starting to sound classical pay my cats on their cute little heads kneel and kiss the mountain collaborate with musicians and videomakers daydream day-be I just made that last one up. Can you tell? I have cried more tears this summer than last summer but still I feel stronger My back stoop is a most welcome landing pad for all of that saline Friends have been landing pads, too (thank you friends) The psychic told me there are rainbows behind me and so I'm gonna take that and run She said, 'go, do things' you are poised' I say, 'I have always been a fan of good posture, thank you very much. Off I go' See you around this country and other ones, you people who read my words I need your help, often If you want me to come to your city/town then maybe you can throw some lavendar seeds at the mayor and she will hire me or that university with all of the lesbians and those sensitive men I dig so much will need a poet to come poem Or maybe you know the venues the artists to team up with shit, maybe you even have funding My psychic said 'ask for help!' Ok, i shall see you around, maybe in your hometown or maybe on a sidewalk or maybe in the afterlife I have only had one gluten free beer so far this end-of-workday and I am typing so fast with such brazen requests that I think gluten free beer is spiked with extra content or magic be well, t I've been on my motorcycle
i've been in bodies of water
I've even been on dates under moons, on bicycles, in tents.
It's a good summer...

It's not like last summer, when Jack Layton was still alive and my heart arrythmia was recently fixed and how to be alone was getting lots of youtube hits
back in 2010 when the sun shone hotter
and we all stayed in the water longer

but this summer is more real
there's more grit
it's more east coast than BC
more scraggly bush than tall tall tree

And i've been writing
Fragments about religion and women
new poems about work and witches
songs about the lonely days that linger on

This fall I will go to the west coast, for writers festivals and to eat salmon
I will sit in my first hot spring, goddamn it
I am planning this
I also get to go to Carolina!
Do you live in Carolina? Who lives in Carolina?
I will be tootling around with some industry peeps, showcasing and inquiring into where are the good coffee shops
and I-know-none-of-the-locals-are-swimming-but-i-am-from-canada-and-so-this-is-like-the-tropics-and-where-is-the-quarry?

i will also do these things:
pick berries
make soup
ride my bicycle
ride my moto with a scarve that blows in the wind
sew old cheap dresses into new, weird ones
go on more dates
write more poems
play the piano that sounds so honky tonk it's starting to sound classical
pay my cats on their cute little heads
kneel and kiss the mountain
collaborate with musicians and videomakers
daydream
day-be

I just made that last one up. Can you tell?

I have cried more tears this summer than last summer but still I feel stronger
My back stoop is a most welcome landing pad for all of that saline
Friends have been landing pads, too (thank you friends)

The psychic told me there are rainbows behind me and so I'm gonna take that and run
She said, 'go, do things' you are poised'
I say, 'I have always been a fan of good posture, thank you very much. Off I go'

See you around this country and other ones, you people who read my words
I need your help, often
If you want me to come to your city/town then maybe you can throw some lavendar seeds at the mayor and she will hire me
or that university with all of the lesbians and those sensitive men I dig so much will need a poet to come
poem
Or maybe you know the venues
the artists to team up with
shit, maybe you even have funding

My psychic said 'ask for help!'
Ok, i shall

see you around, maybe in your hometown
or maybe on a sidewalk or maybe in the afterlife

I have only had one gluten free beer so far this end-of-workday and I am typing so fast with such brazen requests that I think gluten free beer is spiked with extra content
or magic

be well,
t
]]> Fri, 02 Sep 2011 04:04:39 GMT 679C51CBDF4F93EEBC80B82BA21D64A3 http://tanyadavis.ca/blog.cfm?feature=1831197&postid=1162580 Now I am 32. I marked the ocassion by cooking a large feast for a lot of people I love and hosting a dance party. Friends brought a sound system that turned my house into a club. But the kind of club where you can still get some dancing done because there is room enough for everyone and all of our limbs to flail and be flung and the music was actually good. I bought a 9 and a half pound salmon and rode it home on my moto, in my backpack. If you cook it, they will come. The Gods gave me a thunder and lightning storm. It was 6 hours long and that is not an exageration. I buzzed around like a bumblebee, between friends and crushes and songs front porch, back porch, kitchen I did a costume change and accepted, gratefully, their applause I partied all night long 6am, you haven't looked that beautiful in awhile... And now I am 32 and it's time to keep working. I've had some pretty great converations about the balance between work and play, effort and joy, the intermingling thereof. I am working on some new collaborations with people. They are not ready to put out into the world yet but this fall they will be. I am also putting together a show for the Halifax Fringe Fest. What is it about? I don't know yet! This weekend I am giving a workshop on performance poetry at a writers festival in Shelburne Nova Scotia. Don't tell anyone but teaching makes me nervous. I am not a teacher, I am an artist. And sometime people think that artists can teach, because sometime they can But can I? Not sure. I can talk. I can lead by example? I can show some tips and facilitate a discussion. We will see. I give a fair amount of 'workshops' Hopefully people learn some things.. or think some things... In other news, I'll be to western canada this october, for writers festivals and shows In september i am going to drift away to a mountain in new england and hug some trees and smell some moss and stuff. Ha. That sounds amazing actually.. right now it is a daydream.. we will see. We will see, we will see or will we? do we? can't tell everything is fuzzy t
I marked the ocassion by cooking a large feast for a lot of people I love and hosting a dance party.
Friends brought a sound system that turned my house into a club.
But the kind of club where you can still get some dancing done
because there is room enough for everyone
and all of our limbs to flail and be flung
and the music was actually good.

I bought a 9 and a half pound salmon and rode it home on my moto, in my backpack.

If you cook it, they will come.
The Gods gave me a thunder and lightning storm.
It was 6 hours long
and that is not an exageration.

I buzzed around like a bumblebee, between friends and crushes and songs
front porch, back porch, kitchen
I did a costume change and accepted, gratefully, their applause
I partied all night long

6am, you haven't looked that beautiful in awhile...

And now I am 32 and it's time to keep working.
I've had some pretty great converations about the balance between work and play, effort and joy, the intermingling thereof.
I am working on some new collaborations with people.
They are not ready to put out into the world yet but this fall they will be.

I am also putting together a show for the Halifax Fringe Fest.
What is it about?
I don't know yet!

This weekend I am giving a workshop on performance poetry at a writers festival in Shelburne Nova Scotia.
Don't tell anyone but teaching makes me nervous.
I am not a teacher, I am an artist.
And sometime people think that artists can teach, because sometime they can
But can I?
Not sure. I can talk. I can lead by example? I can show some tips and facilitate a discussion.
We will see.
I give a fair amount of 'workshops'
Hopefully people learn some things.. or think some things...

In other news, I'll be to western canada this october, for writers festivals and shows
In september i am going to drift away to a mountain in new england and hug some trees and smell some moss and stuff.
Ha. That sounds amazing actually..
right now it is a daydream.. we will see.

We will see, we will see
or will we?
do we?
can't tell
everything is fuzzy

t


]]> Fri, 05 Aug 2011 22:13:12 GMT F3F1E4EF9B5EAF66C24A6E4847D25E20 http://tanyadavis.ca/blog.cfm?feature=1831197&postid=1128222 Well, last week was Pride week in Halifax and I was super gay. Highlights include: Lesbian robot sex on stage after weird and hilarious skit Dressing up and singing an Annie Lennox song, with back up singers! (No more I love yous... those high notes were high but audience members assured me I did a good job, I supposed it worked fine, in Tanya Davis style, when I just breathed the high notes instead of actually hitting them :) All of the cute gay boys that made me wish I was a gay boy! Plays at the Queer Acts Theatre Festival Rding my motorcyle around town.. oh, wait, that wasn't a part of pride week. Performing my new pride poem in front of the mass of people gathered after the parade Going down the giant blown up pirate ship slide! 6 times! The first adult ride I have been on in years! Amaaaaazing! And now it is just another week and there is just some more construction outside my door and I am justanother poet waking up on a monday wondering what to do and what it is for I should write lists on sunday nights instead of monday AM's But, still, I had a nice time at the coffee shop planning to plan things Watching my pen move across paper like it had an important task to do Trying to remember that time is just time and I don't need to run so fast. Meditation helps, a bit. Last night I had some fresh air and then played the piano for a long time. I recorded blips on my phone that I hope to go back to turn them into songs and then I started a new one on the guitar about fidelity, spurred on by a beautiful married woman and also flirtation and the nature of relation and how we pass tension back and forth like it's a dish to savour yes please, more please There are no clouds in Halifax skies today my motorcycle is running fine and there are lakes nearby and probably I will put myself in one The bicycle beckons as well either way it'll be me and two wheels and a body of water After some more planning, that is after a bit of poem-writing spurred on by life's poetry and also some granola and some house-cleaning In an effort to remember that life is happening all the time and not just in my dayplanner I have vowed to do one house task a day to beautify to settle in sit down to keep my feet on the ground Yesterday I clipped the lawn (I can only afford a weed wacker, not a mower, so it is a slow process...) Today maybe I will re-pot that plant that is falling over Oh, summer, you're so good Also, I commited myself to a fringe play here in Halifax in early September! So I will work on that. I mean, it's not a play, per se. But it'll be something OK, random randomness What is this blog about? Dunno. It is representative of my current state of mind - scattered, many focuses (focii?), high on coffee... td Highlights include:

Lesbian robot sex on stage after weird and hilarious skit

Dressing up and singing an Annie Lennox song, with back up singers! (No more I love yous... those high notes were high but audience members assured me I did a good job, I supposed it worked fine, in Tanya Davis style, when I just breathed the high notes instead of actually hitting them :)

All of the cute gay boys that made me wish I was a gay boy!

Plays at the Queer Acts Theatre Festival

Rding my motorcyle around town.. oh, wait, that wasn't a part of pride week.

Performing my new pride poem in front of the mass of people gathered after the parade

Going down the giant blown up pirate ship slide! 6 times! The first adult ride I have been on in years! Amaaaaazing!

And now it is just another week and there is just some more construction outside my door
and I am justanother poet waking up on a monday wondering what to do and what it is for

I should write lists on sunday nights instead of monday AM's
But, still, I had a nice time at the coffee shop planning to plan things
Watching my pen move across paper like it had an important task to do
Trying to remember that time is just time and I don't need to run so fast. Meditation helps, a bit.

Last night I had some fresh air and then played the piano for a long time. I recorded blips on my phone that I hope to go back to
turn them into songs
and then I started a new one on the guitar about fidelity,
spurred on by a beautiful married woman
and also flirtation
and the nature
of relation
and how we pass tension
back and forth
like it's a dish to savour

yes please, more please

There are no clouds in Halifax skies today
my motorcycle is running fine
and there are lakes nearby
and probably I will put myself in one
The bicycle beckons as well
either way it'll be me and two wheels and a body of water

After some more planning, that is
after a bit of poem-writing
spurred on by life's poetry
and also some granola
and some house-cleaning

In an effort to remember that life is happening all the time
and not just in my dayplanner
I have vowed to do one house task a day
to beautify
to settle in
sit down
to keep my feet on the ground

Yesterday I clipped the lawn (I can only afford a weed wacker, not a mower, so it is a slow process...)
Today maybe I will re-pot that plant that is falling over

Oh, summer, you're so good

Also, I commited myself to a fringe play here in Halifax in early September!
So I will work on that. I mean, it's not a play, per se. But it'll be something

OK, random randomness
What is this blog about?
Dunno.
It is representative of my current state of mind - scattered, many focuses (focii?), high on coffee...

td

]]> Mon, 25 Jul 2011 20:08:25 GMT 25B6C7B98A243EDC3196D424D717802D http://tanyadavis.ca/blog.cfm?feature=1831197&postid=1092364 I'm flying to England in 3 hours! I am packed but I have some cookies in the fridge that I shouldn't forget It's summer in Halifax and I have been swimming a bunch of times, in my favorite lake which is called Long Lake. I have so much to say... But I have to call a cab! Last minute-ness I am chasing my life around a lot lately. Well, I have been, but that's changing, I feel a shift, a slowing down. For instance, i've been writing more these days And for that I feel relieved more peace intrigue I found me a motorbike, it is black and pretty I will own it in one week First, though, a trip over the ocean i land in London tomorrow morning for two days off ! I am going to eat cadbury chocolate bars and walkandwalkandwalk And hopefully go dancing and see music that is amazing and maybe even free Then on Monday I take a train to Wales to showcase at a conference that is for presenters from rural UK in hopes that they will like what I do and want to book me So then I will go back across the ocean in the future! Ok, really, I am full of words to share but the cab, I have to call one I am excited to talk about my new book. It's out! You can find it at chapters stores (indigo) in Canada. Request it if it's not there Or you can find it at chapters online or amazon, too I will post more soon You should see how fast I am typing this I went dancing at a party last night that smelled of bodies shaking and summer There was bumping and grinding that felt safe and sexy and full of gold Love, there's so much of it, td I am packed but I have some cookies in the fridge that I shouldn't forget
It's summer in Halifax and I have been swimming a bunch of times, in my favorite lake which is called Long Lake.
I have so much to say...

But I have to call a cab!
Last minute-ness
I am chasing my life around a lot lately. Well, I have been, but that's changing, I feel a shift, a slowing down. For instance, i've been writing more these days
And for that I feel relieved
more peace
intrigue

I found me a motorbike, it is black and pretty
I will own it in one week

First, though, a trip over the ocean
i land in London tomorrow morning for two days off
!
I am going to eat cadbury chocolate bars and walkandwalkandwalk
And hopefully go dancing
and see music that is amazing
and maybe even free

Then on Monday I take a train to Wales to showcase at a conference that is for presenters from rural UK
in hopes that they will like what I do and want to book me
So then I will go back across the ocean in the future!

Ok, really, I am full of words to share but the cab, I have to call one

I am excited to talk about my new book. It's out!
You can find it at chapters stores (indigo) in Canada. Request it if it's not there
Or you can find it at chapters online or amazon, too

I will post more soon
You should see how fast I am typing this
I went dancing at a party last night that smelled of bodies shaking and summer
There was bumping and grinding that felt safe and sexy and full of gold

Love, there's so much of it,

td
]]> Sat, 09 Jul 2011 07:16:41 GMT 5697903ACBDB57F98F2DEAA8E67A9FFD http://tanyadavis.ca/blog.cfm?feature=1831197&postid=1051005 I have a chocolate bar. It is a family-sized one and tonight I am an entire family. I will soon be an entire family in front of tv on the internet with my exciting choco bar. And I will watch some weird reality show that I stream for free while hoping that such an activity does not give my computer a virus. Tv on the internet is weird but I like it. Because there are no commercials and I like to watch good storytelling, be it about vampires, motorcycle clubs, lesbians or historical times. Tonight it might be motorcycle clubs. Because I just got my motorcycle license! Woo! And please don't tell me to be careful or about a motorcycle accident you heard about recently. Of course I will be careful. And news of motorcycle accidents does not make me a more cautious rider, it just makes me paranoid. There are always accidents, everyday, with all sorts of vehicles and tools and playground equipment and staircases and on and on. They are tragic and commonplace. I hope to not have one. That is my intention. I took a safety course. It was all weekend long here in Halifax, Nova Scotia. 8 hours each day on a motorcycle, from pushing it around the parking lot, to turning it on and off, to getting into first gear then second gear then around the pylons and corners. And now I have a beginners permit because I passed the necessary test and they trust me. Inwardly, I cried. I swelled up. Because I've been wanting to ride a bike for half my life and it intimidated me and though I knew I could do it I was still scared of failing, of looking foolish. Aren't we all... So, now I have a license but no bike. I am searching on kijiji. But I have no money. So I am looking at cheap ones. But I don't know how to fix them. So I am looking for cheap ones in good shape. But I don't know how to tell. So I am feeling nervous about calling the phone numbers that are connected to the bikes that seem cheap and yet in good shape. Life is a series of obstacles. Is it? I'm not sure. I'm not sure what life is. That's okay. To the person that commented to me about my last blog. Thank you. Yes, it IS okay. Today I rode my bike to an appt, as I do, and I passed a dreamy motorcycle. I'm going to call the number. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe with my mom nearby who is worried a bit but secretly excited for this new venture of mine. She knows I follow my soul around, my irrational and beauty-loving soul. And she must also know that I have good defensive driving skills. And I've done other 'crazy' things. I'm reading 'Just Kids' by Patti Smith. It's inspiring. I don't listen to her music, I haven't much at all. But I know a bit about her and respect her work and what she's done. It's a great story. Today I got the copies of my first published book. 10 copies to do with as I wish. I will give them to my family and my close friends. I gave one to myself already. I've been carrying it around and I take it out of my bag and run my hand over the cover once in awhile. I've always wanted a book. It's my first book and I'm nervous. How will people respond, what will they think, what will they say? I have thin skin.. But I'm proud, like I am about the motorcycle license. Things I've wanted to do. I have no money and that is a blog entry in and of itself (because I've been thinking about that lately, about what it takes to make an income after so much investment..) but I have a published book and a motorcycle license. And friends and support and fans who might read this blog and a bicycle and today is summer and so I dove naked into a lake to celebrate. I can dive into lakes, naked if I want because there is so much space. No people, save a beautiful friend who supports such ventures. I offered something to the gods, because they have been good to me and they have been good to us. We still have a planet and it still supports us, though we are terrible stewards. I don't even know if I believe in gods. I don't believe in god. Plural gods make more sense to me. It's just like a concept of interconnection and a huge web and everyone is a part of it, all the gods, all the myths, all the stories. Sure, why not. I'm very impressionable. I'm also typing really fast and I only meant to say hello and tell you about my book and that I would write more soon. Well, I will write more soon. I will include the details about where to buy my book. It will be in some stores and also online. The chocolate bar, the motorcycle club stories, it's all waiting. It's been a long day and darkness has descended and I am going to sit on my plaid chair and tv on the internet is going to tell me a story. Be well, td I will soon be an entire family in front of tv on the internet with my exciting choco bar. And I will watch some weird reality show that I stream for free while hoping that such an activity does not give my computer a virus.
Tv on the internet is weird but I like it. Because there are no commercials and I like to watch good storytelling, be it about vampires, motorcycle clubs, lesbians or historical times. Tonight it might be motorcycle clubs. Because I just got my motorcycle license!

Woo!

And please don't tell me to be careful or about a motorcycle accident you heard about recently. Of course I will be careful. And news of motorcycle accidents does not make me a more cautious rider, it just makes me paranoid. There are always accidents, everyday, with all sorts of vehicles and tools and playground equipment and staircases and on and on. They are tragic and commonplace. I hope to not have one. That is my intention.

I took a safety course. It was all weekend long here in Halifax, Nova Scotia. 8 hours each day on a motorcycle, from pushing it around the parking lot, to turning it on and off, to getting into first gear then second gear then around the pylons and corners. And now I have a beginners permit because I passed the necessary test and they trust me. Inwardly, I cried. I swelled up. Because I've been wanting to ride a bike for half my life and it intimidated me and though I knew I could do it I was still scared of failing, of looking foolish. Aren't we all...

So, now I have a license but no bike. I am searching on kijiji. But I have no money. So I am looking at cheap ones. But I don't know how to fix them. So I am looking for cheap ones in good shape. But I don't know how to tell. So I am feeling nervous about calling the phone numbers that are connected to the bikes that seem cheap and yet in good shape.
Life is a series of obstacles.
Is it?
I'm not sure.
I'm not sure what life is.
That's okay.
To the person that commented to me about my last blog. Thank you. Yes, it IS okay.

Today I rode my bike to an appt, as I do, and I passed a dreamy motorcycle. I'm going to call the number. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe with my mom nearby who is worried a bit but secretly excited for this new venture of mine. She knows I follow my soul around, my irrational and beauty-loving soul. And she must also know that I have good defensive driving skills. And I've done other 'crazy' things.

I'm reading 'Just Kids' by Patti Smith. It's inspiring. I don't listen to her music, I haven't much at all. But I know a bit about her and respect her work and what she's done. It's a great story.

Today I got the copies of my first published book. 10 copies to do with as I wish. I will give them to my family and my close friends. I gave one to myself already. I've been carrying it around and I take it out of my bag and run my hand over the cover once in awhile. I've always wanted a book. It's my first book and I'm nervous. How will people respond, what will they think, what will they say? I have thin skin..
But I'm proud, like I am about the motorcycle license. Things I've wanted to do. I have no money and that is a blog entry in and of itself (because I've been thinking about that lately, about what it takes to make an income after so much investment..) but I have a published book and a motorcycle license. And friends and support and fans who might read this blog and a bicycle and today is summer and so I dove naked into a lake to celebrate. I can dive into lakes, naked if I want because there is so much space. No people, save a beautiful friend who supports such ventures. I offered something to the gods, because they have been good to me and they have been good to us. We still have a planet and it still supports us, though we are terrible stewards. I don't even know if I believe in gods. I don't believe in god. Plural gods make more sense to me. It's just like a concept of interconnection and a huge web and everyone is a part of it, all the gods, all the myths, all the stories. Sure, why not. I'm very impressionable.

I'm also typing really fast and I only meant to say hello and tell you about my book and that I would write more soon.
Well, I will write more soon. I will include the details about where to buy my book. It will be in some stores and also online.
The chocolate bar, the motorcycle club stories, it's all waiting. It's been a long day and darkness has descended and I am going to sit on my plaid chair and tv on the internet is going to tell me a story.

Be well,

td
]]> Wed, 22 Jun 2011 08:25:58 GMT DD33813139437166FA6C2CCB667AB540 http://tanyadavis.ca/blog.cfm?feature=1831197&postid=988437 Soon. For now I make nettle soup. With grated dubliner cheese and roasted pepitas on top. I love to cook. I don't do it as much as I'd like to. Either because I am travelling, or my housemates cook something first, or I go out for dinner because I also love going out for dinner. Or just becase. But this morning, this holiday monday that feels like sunday, I am cooking. The sun woke me up early, in concert with my cat. They both wanted me to get up. Quiet house, quiet city, I laid down my yoga mat. Then I drank pine tea (tastes like woods and freedom!) And then I caught up to emails I had put stars beside and now I am waiting for the nettle soup to be ready. These mornings are good, these domestic and slow, quiet ones. You know what else is good? Waking up in a new city and finding a good place for breakfast, recalling new faces from last night's show, both cute and interesting. It is good to be on tour and I look forward to going back out there! In a few days I fly to the midcountry and I start this tour with 3 days off. I am a worker bee! Ha, well, I sort of am. And that is why I build days off, deliberately, into my tour schedule. I have friends to see and dates to go on. I have good food to eat and lakes to swim in. I have poems to write and I like writing them in unfamiliar coffee shops, anonymous and quiet. All of this is fodder for my creative work and, also, my soul. Recently, I finished a book called 'Care of the Soul', by Thomas Moore. Did I talk about this in my last blog. HHmm, can't remember. Probably. Anyway, it was a good reminder that it is important to feed one's soul, in all sorts of beautiful, invigorating, irrational, and thought-provoking ways. I forget that. We all do. We work so much. This long weekend reminds me that I support the 4 day work week, for the good of all. If we worked a bit less we would be happier. And all of those technological advancements could be put to better use. We would be more productive, after having rested for a solid 3 days. There would be more work to go around perhaps, all of those unemployed people who want to work could get some work and all of those people who are addicted to work would have to work less and, gasp, maybe even consumme less. We would burn less fuel by millions of workers commuting one less day a week. We would use less power. We would see our kids more. We would cook more, relax more, smell the roses more.. I could go on. I could be more descriptive and articulate but my nettle soup is almost done and this is not an essay. Soul food, right, that's what I was talking about. Well, I offered my soul some food recently. It's called 'motorcycle lessons'! Yep. Me and a long desired piece of machinery are going to become friends later this summer and I am pumped for that! I will remind myself, with nettles, with pine trees, with motorcycles, with dates, with friends, with swims in lakes and deep breaths that life is for living I want to make art. I consider myself very lucky that I get to do this I want less people to be suffering and I want to work to help that My soul wants to feel things, too. It is irrational. I don't need to prove that. I'll just let it meander it's way sometime. Kind of like my blogs.. meander meander be well, td But this morning, this holiday monday that feels like sunday, I am cooking. The sun woke me up early, in concert with my cat. They both wanted me to get up.
Quiet house, quiet city, I laid down my yoga mat.
Then I drank pine tea (tastes like woods and freedom!)
And then I caught up to emails I had put stars beside and now I am waiting for the nettle soup to be ready.

These mornings are good, these domestic and slow, quiet ones.
You know what else is good? Waking up in a new city and finding a good place for breakfast, recalling new faces from last night's show, both cute and interesting.
It is good to be on tour and I look forward to going back out there!

In a few days I fly to the midcountry and I start this tour with 3 days off. I am a worker bee! Ha, well, I sort of am. And that is why I build days off, deliberately, into my tour schedule. I have friends to see and dates to go on. I have good food to eat and lakes to swim in. I have poems to write and I like writing them in unfamiliar coffee shops, anonymous and quiet. All of this is fodder for my creative work and, also, my soul.

Recently, I finished a book called 'Care of the Soul', by Thomas Moore. Did I talk about this in my last blog. HHmm, can't remember. Probably. Anyway, it was a good reminder that it is important to feed one's soul, in all sorts of beautiful, invigorating, irrational, and thought-provoking ways. I forget that. We all do. We work so much.
This long weekend reminds me that I support the 4 day work week, for the good of all. If we worked a bit less we would be happier. And all of those technological advancements could be put to better use. We would be more productive, after having rested for a solid 3 days. There would be more work to go around perhaps, all of those unemployed people who want to work could get some work and all of those people who are addicted to work would have to work less and, gasp, maybe even consumme less. We would burn less fuel by millions of workers commuting one less day a week. We would use less power. We would see our kids more. We would cook more, relax more, smell the roses more..

I could go on. I could be more descriptive and articulate but my nettle soup is almost done and this is not an essay.
Soul food, right, that's what I was talking about. Well, I offered my soul some food recently. It's called 'motorcycle lessons'! Yep. Me and a long desired piece of machinery are going to become friends later this summer and I am pumped for that!

I will remind myself, with nettles, with pine trees, with motorcycles, with dates, with friends, with swims in lakes and deep breaths
that life is for living
I want to make art. I consider myself very lucky that I get to do this
I want less people to be suffering and I want to work to help that
My soul wants to feel things, too. It is irrational. I don't need to prove that. I'll just let it meander it's way sometime.
Kind of like my blogs.. meander meander

be well,
td
]]> Mon, 23 May 2011 21:45:11 GMT BE75A7411135F4DF325B9E6A47D531BC http://tanyadavis.ca/blog.cfm?feature=1831197&postid=961607 My housemate is making rice and curry dahl I am curled up in my office wishing the rain would not fall for at least a day, frig off I need the sun to lift me from this lethargy, warm me up It started with the election. That was when I realized that I live in a bubble. I suppose I realize it from time to timen but that was when I was, once again, reminded. This little peninsula is full of left-leaning socialists and we are left learning on the democrats to pull us out of this So much can happen in 4 years. What sort of bills will get introduced and passed through, will it be as bad as I fear? This morning, over a meeting with city staff about my new position as Poet Laureate I somehow brought up armeggedon. I didn't mean to, I mean, it wasn't premeditated. I noticed that my term ends in 2012 and I mentioned how, according to some, that could be a really significant year. I don't believe in armeggedon, necessarily. But I do believe that things might be crashing around us a little bit, going from bad to worse. And I believe that things need to get pretty bad before the majority of people will take action to do something about it. So, maybe we're getting closer to action.. Our newly elected government is just one sign of things going from bad to worse. Goodbye arts funding, hello prisons. Hello more war, goodbye peacekeeping Nice to meet you privatized heatlh care and subsidized oil digging This is not all new but now it's just less secret. And so many disasters kiling so many people ruining soil when food is already scarce, sources keep depleting. Holy wars still waging and no god is winning I read a book called Ren-Gen, a few months ago. The author claims that we are heading for another renaissance age and, to prove that, she draws parellels between what's happening now and what happened preceeding the Italian renaissance. Things like the breakdown of power and the rising up of citizens (I think of all the govts toppling or struggling in the Middle East, Northern Africa); the dissemination of information to more people (during the Italian renaissance this was helped by the network of roads that were legally once only for the Roman army but then the people said 'fuck that, I need to go somewhere, do something, learn something and I, too, am going to use this really practical network of roads'. These days, the internet is our accessible system of 'roads' leading us to all kinds of free information, regardless of governmental hieararchies that might try to keep us mis/uninformed. The author also compares the balance of power shifting away from a major centre (Rome) to minor centres (Florence). Is that like how Halifax is just as cool as Toronto? I don't know, that ones a stretch of a comparison, but maybe you see where I'm going with this. I'm no scholar, certainly no renaissance era scholar. Still, my gut tells me that something's going down, lots of things. Our world and the people in it are having a hard time and something's gotta give. I am an optimist so, luckily, this does not all feel bleak to me. In fact, it feels hopeful. Is 2012 the age of a new astrology? Like, aquarius or something? Could it be there year that more people look around and see the suffering of the world, their neighbors, this earth we're standing on? And then, by feeling that pain, more of us could work for compassion? Compassion instead of growth, instead of economic gain instead of power, instead of oblivion to others' pain It's been raining and raining I've been complaining I want a motorcycle so I can protect myself and ride away though I know that that is not the way. Luckily, i don't have my license and I have a penchant for company So I stay In my office with drops chasing each other down the windowpane Luckily, rain makes me think of books so I've been reading them again Remembering that it's a good use of my time, that my soul aches for words for sentences for the depths of the page down where I don't know the answer, where I really can't say but I'll hang out there, soaking in mystery's grace If 2012 is an armeggedon than I want to participate. I am curled up in my office wishing the rain would not fall
for at least a day, frig off
I need the sun to lift me from this lethargy, warm me up

It started with the election.
That was when I realized that I live in a bubble. I suppose I realize it from time to timen but that was when I was, once again, reminded.
This little peninsula is full of left-leaning socialists
and we are left learning on the democrats
to pull us out of this
So much can happen in 4 years.
What sort of bills will get introduced and passed through, will it be as bad as I fear?

This morning, over a meeting with city staff about my new position as Poet Laureate I somehow brought up armeggedon. I didn't mean to, I mean, it wasn't premeditated.
I noticed that my term ends in 2012 and I mentioned how, according to some, that could be a really significant year. I don't believe in armeggedon, necessarily. But I do believe that things might be crashing around us a little bit, going from bad to worse. And I believe that things need to get pretty bad before the majority of people will take action to do something about it. So, maybe we're getting closer to action..

Our newly elected government is just one sign of things going from bad to worse.
Goodbye arts funding, hello prisons. Hello more war, goodbye peacekeeping
Nice to meet you privatized heatlh care and subsidized oil digging
This is not all new but now it's just less secret.
And so many disasters kiling so many people
ruining soil when food is already scarce, sources keep depleting.
Holy wars still waging
and no god is winning

I read a book called Ren-Gen, a few months ago. The author claims that we are heading for another renaissance age and, to prove that, she draws parellels between what's happening now and what happened preceeding the Italian renaissance. Things like the breakdown of power and the rising up of citizens (I think of all the govts toppling or struggling in the Middle East, Northern Africa); the dissemination of information to more people (during the Italian renaissance this was helped by the network of roads that were legally once only for the Roman army but then the people said 'fuck that, I need to go somewhere, do something, learn something and I, too, am going to use this really practical network of roads'. These days, the internet is our accessible system of 'roads' leading us to all kinds of free information, regardless of governmental hieararchies that might try to keep us mis/uninformed. The author also compares the balance of power shifting away from a major centre (Rome) to minor centres (Florence). Is that like how Halifax is just as cool as Toronto? I don't know, that ones a stretch of a comparison, but maybe you see where I'm going with this.
I'm no scholar, certainly no renaissance era scholar. Still, my gut tells me that something's going down, lots of things. Our world and the people in it are having a hard time and something's gotta give. I am an optimist so, luckily, this does not all feel bleak to me. In fact, it feels hopeful.

Is 2012 the age of a new astrology? Like, aquarius or something? Could it be there year that more people look around and see the suffering of the world, their neighbors, this earth we're standing on? And then, by feeling that pain, more of us could work for compassion?
Compassion instead of growth, instead of economic gain
instead of power, instead of oblivion to others' pain

It's been raining and raining
I've been complaining
I want a motorcycle so I can protect myself and ride away
though I know that that is not the way.
Luckily, i don't have my license and I have a penchant for company
So I stay
In my office with drops chasing each other down the windowpane

Luckily, rain makes me think of books so I've been reading them again
Remembering that it's a good use of my time, that my soul aches
for words for sentences for the depths of the page
down where I don't know the answer, where I really can't say
but I'll hang out there, soaking in mystery's grace
If 2012 is an armeggedon than I want to participate.

]]> Wed, 11 May 2011 00:27:36 GMT 50EA34525CD998EAB730BB4B35843BC4 http://tanyadavis.ca/blog.cfm?feature=1831197&postid=933492 HIIIIII! I don't know where to begin. So, then, I'm just going to begin. I wanted to write to you, bloggity wog, for the last week. And time kept filling up or else I fell asleep or else I opted for scotch or daydreams I started to drink red wine, in efforts to be romantic So in the future I could say a truthful yes to pretty women and sexy men when they held out glasses with long stems and we could raise them to fuel our antics. Also, I like that red wine doesn't need refrigerators. So, this past week I drank some. Both on dates and alone in my kitchen post connection and pre-decisions and I thought a lot of thoughts. I reflected on the tour from which I just got off. I pondered women who love me and women who I want. i thought of all of the connections that are dropped. I don't drink very often. But in the past coupla weeks I've been with a light head a coupla times. (Do traditional poets hate the word 'coupla'. The english language is fluid and I'm just taking advantage...) There's been reason to celebrate. Here are some reasons: I was just named The Mayor's Poet Laureate of Halifax (for a 2 year term, advocacy, writing, orating, igniting..) I had a great first tour of the UK! (perks include good shows, generous people, cask ales, cadbury chocolate, swimming in the freezing cold ocean, finding the good food, many old churches, stone buildings, accents, edinburgh, london, cute people, music, poetry, trains, inspiration) It is spring! My cat loves me more than ever. My first book of poetry comes out in June. Kisses. My record comes out on vinyl really soon. Plans. New songs. I celebrate these things not only with wine but also with feeling with tears streaming with joy reaching the depths of my being and that sounds cheesy because maybe it is but, you know, i really like cheese! Recently, I sat in Yorkminster cathedral. I snuck on my device to record the voices of the people the choir rejoiced with vigour enough to reach up to the steeple to wake up the birds that were sleeping to shake up that young girl whose heart was once beating with fear of repeating too many mistakes she quivered and reeled in the knowledge that she didn't quite have the right faith and now, these days, she sits in churches and doesn't pray but, still, the tears stream down her face she cries for me, I cry for her we've made our peace And a couple weeks later I am back on my seat on my floor in my room, kneeling at the world's feet and then I am at my own desk while the rain comes down outdoors in sheets trying to keep up the pace the world works while it does change Another tour ends a new one waits And I am beginning.. always td
I don't know where to begin. So, then, I'm just going to begin.

I wanted to write to you, bloggity wog, for the last week. And time kept filling up or else I fell asleep
or else I opted for scotch or daydreams
I started to drink red wine, in efforts to be romantic
So in the future I could say a truthful yes to pretty women and sexy men
when they held out glasses with long stems
and we could raise them to fuel our antics.

Also, I like that red wine doesn't need refrigerators.

So, this past week I drank some. Both on dates and alone in my kitchen
post connection and pre-decisions
and I thought a lot of thoughts.
I reflected on the tour from which I just got off.
I pondered women who love me and women who I want.
i thought of all of the connections that are dropped.

I don't drink very often.
But in the past coupla weeks I've been with a light head a coupla times.
(Do traditional poets hate the word 'coupla'. The english language is fluid and I'm just taking advantage...)

There's been reason to celebrate. Here are some reasons:

I was just named The Mayor's Poet Laureate of Halifax (for a 2 year term, advocacy, writing, orating, igniting..)

I had a great first tour of the UK! (perks include good shows, generous people, cask ales, cadbury chocolate, swimming in the freezing cold ocean, finding the good food, many old churches, stone buildings, accents, edinburgh, london, cute people, music, poetry, trains, inspiration)

It is spring!

My cat loves me more than ever.

My first book of poetry comes out in June.

Kisses.

My record comes out on vinyl really soon.

Plans.

New songs.


I celebrate these things not only with wine but also with feeling
with tears streaming
with joy reaching the depths of my being
and that sounds cheesy
because maybe it is
but, you know, i really like cheese!

Recently, I sat in Yorkminster cathedral.
I snuck on my device to record the voices of the people
the choir rejoiced with vigour enough to reach up to the steeple
to wake up the birds that were sleeping
to shake up that young girl whose heart was once beating with fear of repeating too many mistakes
she quivered and reeled in the knowledge that she didn't quite have the right faith
and now, these days, she sits in churches and doesn't pray
but, still, the tears stream down her face
she cries for me, I cry for her
we've made our peace

And a couple weeks later I am back on my seat
on my floor in my room, kneeling at the world's feet
and then I am at my own desk while the rain comes down outdoors in sheets
trying to keep up the pace
the world works while it does change
Another tour ends a new one waits
And I am beginning.. always

td

]]> Tue, 26 Apr 2011 22:41:10 GMT 0C834480478A21DFFB35244DACF04384 http://tanyadavis.ca/blog.cfm?feature=1831197&postid=855170 it's spring! I have been cooking green things. Like spinach from my farmers' market and lambs quarters. Is that what I mean? I mean those little green leaves that are in mini bunches and come out in spring. Lamb's quarters? Tonight, I made haddock and smashed potatoe with roasted garlic. I also left the 100 mile radius for some tomatillos and cilantro and made green salsa Fresh! I want to eat fresh things. I want to feel fresh things Spring is good 'cause of what it brings. But, I still have a cold, lingering I cough up bits of lung every morning and my ears have been plugged for one month. Ah, winter, you have been beautiful but you need to go away now. For spring equinox I went to a fancy gay dress party in a vest adorned with golden threads. I snuck a flask of whisky in and ordered soda waters all night (ok, so I am either cheap or poor but likely it is a bit of both). And all this week it has been officially spring and so I have been cleaning. Organizing files and stacks of paper. I have felt the weight of winter resisting its inevitable slide off my body, out of my lungs, my head. It lingers. I feel tired and so i let myself hit the snooze button. I read a book on my old plaid chair on a monday afternoon and napped 2 hours away. Had a dream of person I once pined for. And in this dream she was pining back. And the physical affection soothed me and I was happy as a cat, upon waking. I am home for one more week. And then I go to Calgary and then I go to the UK and then I go to PEI. I know, it is an interesting itinerary. I've never been to the UK before I am going to spend some hours in churches and castles Old buildings, in a country that knows better then to tear its old buildings down (ahem... canada) I will find the free things to do in London and find the British queers in Brighton and look out of train windows, thoughts ignighted I will seek out curry because I hear that it's good there I will brave a pub alone, find a high chair like a drunk's throne I will drink a beer that I can't get here I will play shows where I know no one and if they couldn't guess then my accent will show them To the UK, to the unknown, then I opened this page to blog tonight because I thought why not I am stalling on booking airplane tickets I can never decide upon which day to take off I give myself extra days off in cities where i could go dance a lot or find a lover to fill me up, someone intelligent and hot I thought, 'if x equals the day i fly into toronto and y equals the cute people per day that I could talk to then z must be a reason to give myself an extra weekend and play shows enough to eat and pay myself just what is needed or else my math skills have depleted and I am just addicted to justifying my existence ha. I am a weird blogger. I may change my blogging style somday and write about current events or actual news of mine or tips or other people's work I want to share I thought of that just a minute ago when I took a blog break to brush my teeth and let my cat drink from the bathroom sink. Likely, it will change and morph naturally and I don't need to be too strategic It's just a blog Still, I'm glad you're reading it. I will try to write more often and sometimes about concrete things But not tonight, tonight is for nonsense I think I can go book those airplane tickets now be well, td Like spinach from my farmers' market and lambs quarters. Is that what I mean? I mean those little green leaves that are in mini bunches and come out in spring. Lamb's quarters?
Tonight, I made haddock and smashed potatoe with roasted garlic. I also left the 100 mile radius for some tomatillos and cilantro and made green salsa
Fresh!

I want to eat fresh things. I want to feel fresh things
Spring is good 'cause of what it brings.
But, I still have a cold, lingering
I cough up bits of lung every morning
and my ears have been plugged for one month.

Ah, winter, you have been beautiful but you need to go away now.

For spring equinox I went to a fancy gay dress party in a vest adorned with golden threads. I snuck a flask of whisky in and ordered soda waters all night
(ok, so I am either cheap or poor but likely it is a bit of both).
And all this week it has been officially spring and so I have been cleaning. Organizing files and stacks of paper.
I have felt the weight of winter resisting its inevitable slide off my body, out of my lungs, my head.
It lingers.
I feel tired and so i let myself hit the snooze button.
I read a book on my old plaid chair on a monday afternoon and napped 2 hours away.
Had a dream of person I once pined for. And in this dream she was pining back. And the physical affection soothed me and I was happy as a cat, upon waking.

I am home for one more week. And then I go to Calgary and then I go to the UK and then I go to PEI. I know, it is an interesting itinerary.
I've never been to the UK before
I am going to spend some hours in churches and castles
Old buildings, in a country that knows better then to tear its old buildings down (ahem... canada)

I will find the free things to do in London
and find the British queers in Brighton
and look out of train windows, thoughts ignighted

I will seek out curry because I hear that it's good there
I will brave a pub alone, find a high chair
like a drunk's throne
I will drink a beer that I can't get here

I will play shows where I know no one
and if they couldn't guess then my accent will show them
To the UK, to the unknown, then


I opened this page to blog tonight because I thought why not
I am stalling on booking airplane tickets
I can never decide upon which day to take off
I give myself extra days off
in cities where i could go dance a lot
or find a lover to fill me up, someone intelligent and hot
I thought,

'if x equals the day i fly into toronto
and y equals the cute people per day that I could talk to
then z must be a reason
to give myself an extra weekend
and play shows enough to eat and
pay myself just what is needed
or else my math skills have depleted
and I am just addicted to justifying my existence

ha. I am a weird blogger.
I may change my blogging style somday
and write about current events or actual news of mine or tips or other people's work I want to share
I thought of that just a minute ago when I took a blog break to brush my teeth and let my cat drink from the bathroom sink.
Likely, it will change and morph naturally and I don't need to be too strategic
It's just a blog
Still, I'm glad you're reading it.
I will try to write more often
and sometimes about concrete things
But not tonight, tonight is for nonsense

I think I can go book those airplane tickets now

be well,
td

]]> Thu, 24 Mar 2011 08:48:24 GMT 0757F7B019A6038A9F96172B22E27F6C http://tanyadavis.ca/blog.cfm?feature=1831197&postid=811221 It is friday night, in the 11's. I am alone in a hotel room in Athabasca. I never have my own hotel room. This makes me feel both lonely and privileged. I have not yet turned on the tv (although I am considering it) There must be some comedy show on there, and I can laugh to myself, knowing that people on the other sides of the wall might be laughing, too Or maybe there will be a nature documentary featuring baby animals Or the tail end of a mediocre movie that is good enough because the leading actor is sexy, a hunk, a dame in blue jeans. Tonight, on the way home from the gig, we listened to 'Lady in Red' at high volume. I think people must like that song because of the romantic undertones, the pulsing beat, the falsetto Or maybe it is the thought that someone could notice us across a room and be spellbound enough to go home and write about it. As far as I know no one has ever written a song about me. Well, maybe they have, but I haven't heard it. Of course, I haven't dated many musicians. Mostly members of the rythym section. Um... ahem. Sometime I wish I was a drummer. Like last night when I played to a chatty bar in Calgary and people didn't seem to notice or to care. Maybe some did, but they were blocked from my vision by the stage lights and blocked from my eardrums by the noisy tables at the front of the room that had lots to talk about, not to whisper about. They didn't so much as attempt a whisper I was talking with my friend Sonia afterwards (and I was grateful that she came out to the show). We were discussing life, and all the murky stuff therein. We were discussing the meaning of life. That's a hard one. People have been coming up with and following religions for thousands of years to ascertain that, to find some relief from the burning of that question. I think one of the reasons for life - one of the meanings - is connection. It's also one of the meanings for my work, for this art thing I do And when I play a show where people don't seem to care, don't stop chatting long enough to listen, to try to care... then I don't feel like I connect and I wonder what is the point, what is the meaning. It's.... challenging. I may have shed a couple of tears, as subtlely as possible, at the safety of a table at the back of a room at the end of my set. I'm too sensitive for this shit sometime But I love it and I think it's important and it's the work I want to do, it's how I feel I can best contribute So I will keep doing it, even if some nights I cry. I don't think people are bad for talking. I talk, too, once in awhile. But, if I need/want to talk at someone's show I do it in whisper voice not right in front of the stage. Or I do it at a rock show where all volumes are up Or I wait until the song is over. Because maybe the person singing quiet songs on stage is like me and she will slouch off at the end of her set and need to choke emotion back like it was a traitor because people shouldn't see artists crying - it's embarrasing, or silly, or egotistical or weak or flawed or failure or or or... Tonight is better, here in Athabasca in my hotel room with an internet connection I feel connected again. Because the show was in a theatre tonight and in soft seats people are quieter Because i get to blog about this all to a keyboard representing people representing community Because I had a beer with Chris and we talked about our shared love of organs and beautiful buildings. Because we connect past religous differences Because in the van me and The Fugitives (band, not people running from the law) cranked 'Lady in Red' and we all loved it Because I have a red dress at home in my closet and someday I get to wear it again Because I love this weird hard and beautiful life and I have new ideas for songs and poems Tonight, I am alone in a hotel room and recognizing the luxury of that. I will watch something, because I can. And then I will read my Karen Armstrong book about compassion and then I will sleep, long and well. It's hard to meditate and do yoga on tour but not when I have my own hotel room Woot woot to the wooty woot! ... I just remembered that I am happy love to and for you,  td I never have my own hotel room.
This makes me feel both lonely and privileged. I have not yet turned on the tv
(although I am considering it)
There must be some comedy show on there, and I can laugh to myself, knowing that people on the other sides of the wall might be laughing, too
Or maybe there will be a nature documentary featuring baby animals
Or the tail end of a mediocre movie that is good enough because the leading actor is sexy, a hunk, a dame in blue jeans.

Tonight, on the way home from the gig, we listened to 'Lady in Red' at high volume.
I think people must like that song because of the romantic undertones, the pulsing beat, the falsetto
Or maybe it is the thought that someone could notice us across a room and be spellbound enough to go home and write about it.

As far as I know no one has ever written a song about me. Well, maybe they have, but I haven't heard it.
Of course, I haven't dated many musicians.
Mostly members of the rythym section.
Um... ahem.

Sometime I wish I was a drummer.
Like last night when I played to a chatty bar in Calgary and people didn't seem to notice or to care. Maybe some did, but they were blocked from my vision by the stage lights
and blocked from my eardrums by the noisy tables at the front of the room that had lots to talk about, not to whisper about.
They didn't so much as attempt a whisper

I was talking with my friend Sonia afterwards (and I was grateful that she came out to the show). We were discussing life, and all the murky stuff therein.
We were discussing the meaning of life.
That's a hard one. People have been coming up with and following religions for thousands of years to ascertain that, to find some relief from the burning of that question.
I think one of the reasons for life - one of the meanings - is connection.
It's also one of the meanings for my work, for this art thing I do
And when I play a show where people don't seem to care, don't stop chatting long enough to listen, to try to care... then I don't feel like I connect
and I wonder what is the point, what is the meaning.

It's.... challenging. I may have shed a couple of tears, as subtlely as possible, at the safety of a table at the back of a room at the end of my set.
I'm too sensitive for this shit sometime
But I love it
and I think it's important and it's the work I want to do, it's how I feel I can best contribute
So I will keep doing it, even if some nights I cry.

I don't think people are bad for talking. I talk, too, once in awhile. But, if I need/want to talk at someone's show I do it in whisper voice not right in front of the stage.
Or I do it at a rock show where all volumes are up
Or I wait until the song is over.
Because maybe the person singing quiet songs on stage is like me and she will slouch off at the end of her set and need to choke emotion back like it was a traitor
because people shouldn't see artists crying - it's embarrasing, or silly, or egotistical or weak or flawed or failure or or or...

Tonight is better, here in Athabasca in my hotel room with an internet connection
I feel connected again.
Because the show was in a theatre tonight and in soft seats people are quieter
Because i get to blog about this all to a keyboard representing people representing community
Because I had a beer with Chris and we talked about our shared love of organs and beautiful buildings. Because we connect past religous differences
Because in the van me and The Fugitives (band, not people running from the law) cranked 'Lady in Red' and we all loved it
Because I have a red dress at home in my closet and someday I get to wear it again
Because I love this weird hard and beautiful life and I have new ideas for songs and poems

Tonight, I am alone in a hotel room and recognizing the luxury of that.
I will watch something, because I can. And then I will read my Karen Armstrong book about compassion and then I will sleep, long and well.
It's hard to meditate and do yoga on tour but not when I have my own hotel room
Woot woot to the wooty woot!
... I just remembered that I am happy

love to and for you, 
td
]]> Sat, 05 Mar 2011 14:50:48 GMT BC4D803B6579CBEFF3FB3CA052FC66C5 http://tanyadavis.ca/blog.cfm?feature=1831197&postid=802100 Aw, man. I just wrote a long blog post and then hit a button with my pinky finger and accidentally closed the winow! and now my laptop battery is almost dead and my writing streak comes to an end and i have to leave this internet cafe and go to yoga ( to offset the carrying around of my heavy guitar.. and the anxiety of travel, of stages) i am in vancouver, i have been here for a week, in a one bedroom apartment with a cat and a king-sized bed! so, i will have to update this blog another time. for real. this is a mini update. i leave tomorrow to drive across the canadian prairies with The Fugitives, folk poetry band! I am bringing a flask and filling it with whisky so I can stand in the snow under country stars and let the warmth of the situation fill me I shall gaze out of windows and scheme and daydream. about life and art and women. and men, sometimes men. and my little cat. and the next fresh vegetable i get to eat on tour on tour. soon i will write more love you, blog and people td and now my laptop battery is almost dead and my writing streak comes to an end
and i have to leave this internet cafe and go to yoga ( to offset the carrying around of my heavy guitar.. and the anxiety of travel, of stages)
i am in vancouver, i have been here for a week, in a one bedroom apartment with a cat and a king-sized bed!

so, i will have to update this blog another time. for real. this is a mini update.
i leave tomorrow to drive across the canadian prairies with The Fugitives, folk poetry band!
I am bringing a flask and filling it with whisky so I can stand in the snow under country stars and let the warmth of the situation fill me
I shall gaze out of windows and scheme and daydream. about life and art and women. and men, sometimes men. and my little cat. and the next fresh vegetable i get to eat

on tour on tour.
soon i will write more

love you, blog and people
td


]]> Wed, 02 Mar 2011 01:44:14 GMT 0ADF95B0D8BA709968EDE3D59BEABB43 http://tanyadavis.ca/blog.cfm?feature=1831197&postid=758573 If I just sit down and start writing, I might have something, something to say. All those thoughts I thought on the walk home today.. What were they? Something about Cuba and something about winter and probably something about my cat. Likely, there was a thought about being lonely, romantic, I know where to find the on-sale valentine's chocolates at. That all seems rather mundane, have I nothing more interesting to say? Wait. wait. Don't go I will come up with something Thinking... scheming.. looking over at little lou where he lays sweetly sleeping What if my cat dies while I am out on tour?! (Oh no, don't write about that, Tanya, you morbid and obsessive anxiety head) But, the thing is, I may have lots of time to think like this When I am in the passenger seat on a highway looking out the window while an acquaintance is driving whisking us all to the next town by nightime Going on tour again soon Just got back. Not from tour but from one week on a spanish communist island, in fact where things were in serious lack where the governments ideals and what's really real does not really match they didn't have anything and i have so much but is it all perspective, this stuff? i mean, they do have love, it seems they do have public gatherings In Canada (even in the summer), we do not sit around statues and fountains in the hundreds we do not sit out on our stoops to talk to neighbours after supper in Canada, many cars think bikes are in their way in Cuba, the bicycles have just as important a role to play and so do the horses and so do the mopeds people get where they're going to get any way they can they work with what they have In Canada I have so much I came back home to my closet stuffed to the many stores and whatever I wish to pick up to more travel plans, to the work that I love i have so too much and so it is not enough such a clichee such a conundrum i sit at readily available internet and book flights to more places dropping oil like it's made for wasting jet-setting while justifying its okayness making up words 'cause why not? I have more privilege than I even thought So, is it good to go to poor countries to remind myself of the world's suffering so I can spend my money and leave some of my stuff there thinking I've done good? See, judge on the inside, I didn't visit the resorts and now I've opened up my mind I'm feeling out of sorts and this is why: I don't understand anything I am ignorant and clueless I think governments should not be so useless people should not be so foolish yet I have no solutions I have a temporary sandal tan that I am, admittedly, proud of my skin can still get brown some though I am gleaming white, if not pink I have a life of luxury behind me and out in front when compared with that of some 'Comparisons are odious' some sage once said and then some savvy business person once printed and sold and some friend of mine put it on her bathroom wall and one time, while peeing, with mountains of toilet paper available, I read it and agreed with them all friend, business person, sage and then I continued comparing myself to everyone else my wealth to my poverty to your riches to their honesty it goes on and on, you see and now I sit at my internet and type to a screen I think is my friend my cat is sleeping I have a bar of chocolate waiting I have a list of things to compare to other things my heart to my brain my loss to your gain my profit to your pain Canada and Cuba and airplanes I sat, tonight, to write and meant to talk about love or sex or chocolate or lack thereof instead, meanderings around issues so big I don't think they can be solved but why not? I didn't even tell you about where I went swimming or that day I rode a bicycle around with Daniel and he bought us fruit that I had never seen before, that could never survive the trip to Canada i didn't tell you about the coffee there, or the roosters or the best conversation I had which was with a nine year old girl who didn't get impatient with me, she just used more hand gestures when explaining things there is so much to say, always it both inspires and tires me as does the world, these days these comparisons I can't help but make. td What were they?
Something about Cuba and something about winter and probably something about my cat.
Likely, there was a thought about being lonely, romantic, I know where to find the on-sale valentine's chocolates at.

That all seems rather mundane, have I nothing more interesting to say?
Wait. wait.
Don't go
I will come up with something

Thinking... scheming.. looking over at little lou where he lays sweetly sleeping
What if my cat dies while I am out on tour?!
(Oh no, don't write about that, Tanya, you morbid and obsessive anxiety head)
But, the thing is, I may have lots of time to think like this
When I am in the passenger seat
on a highway
looking out the window while an acquaintance is driving
whisking us all to the next town by nightime

Going on tour again soon
Just got back.
Not from tour but from one week on a spanish communist island, in fact
where things were in serious lack
where the governments ideals and what's really real does not really match
they didn't have anything
and i have so much
but
is it all perspective, this stuff?
i mean, they do have love, it seems
they do have public gatherings

In Canada (even in the summer), we do not sit around statues and fountains in the hundreds
we do not sit out on our stoops to talk to neighbours after supper
in Canada, many cars think bikes are in their way
in Cuba, the bicycles have just as important a role to play
and so do the horses
and so do the mopeds
people get where they're going to get
any way they can
they work with what they have

In Canada I have so much
I came back home to my closet stuffed
to the many stores and whatever I wish to pick up
to more travel plans, to the work that I love
i have so too much and so it is not enough

such a clichee
such a conundrum

i sit at readily available internet and book flights to more places
dropping oil like it's made for wasting
jet-setting while justifying its okayness
making up words 'cause why not?

I have more privilege than I even thought

So, is it good to go to poor countries to remind myself of the world's suffering
so I can spend my money and leave some of my stuff there
thinking I've done good?
See, judge on the inside, I didn't visit the resorts and now I've opened up my mind
I'm feeling out of sorts and this is why:
I don't understand anything
I am ignorant and clueless
I think governments should not be so useless
people should not be so foolish
yet I have no solutions

I have a temporary sandal tan
that I am, admittedly, proud of
my skin can still get brown some
though I am gleaming white, if not pink
I have a life of luxury behind me
and out in front
when compared with that of some

'Comparisons are odious'
some sage once said
and then some savvy business person once printed
and sold
and some friend of mine put it on her bathroom wall
and one time, while peeing, with mountains of toilet paper available,
I read it and agreed with them all
friend, business person, sage
and then I continued comparing myself to everyone else
my wealth to my poverty to your riches to their honesty
it goes on and on, you see

and now I sit at my internet and type to a screen I think is my friend
my cat is sleeping
I have a bar of chocolate waiting
I have a list of things to compare to other things
my heart to my brain
my loss to your gain
my profit to your pain
Canada and Cuba and airplanes

I sat, tonight, to write and meant to talk about love
or sex or chocolate or lack thereof
instead, meanderings around issues so big I don't think they can be solved
but why not?
I didn't even tell you about where I went swimming
or that day I rode a bicycle around with Daniel and he bought us fruit that I had never seen before, that could never survive the trip to Canada
i didn't tell you about the coffee there, or the roosters
or the best conversation I had which was with a nine year old girl who didn't get impatient with me, she just used more hand gestures when explaining things

there is so much to say, always
it both inspires and tires me
as does the world, these days
these comparisons I can't help but make.

td

]]> Fri, 11 Feb 2011 10:02:15 GMT 134DE0961C148D0974654EB6C6933333 http://tanyadavis.ca/blog.cfm?feature=1831197&postid=732169 I am not packed yet but I am leaving in 2 hours. Life keeps happening. It gets busy and my suitcase stays empty until the last minute possible and even then I decide I should update my blog first. Hi blog! Winter is here in Halifax. Just finished the <a href="http://www.inthedeadofwinter.com" target="_new">www.inthedeadofwinter.com music festival. It was grand! I am one of the organizers, I guess you could say. I lack an official title though. I saw CR Avery make quiet a packed room with a poem about Pierre Elliot Trudeau. I heard Mary Gauthier speak on saturday afternoon about the craft of songwriting. I ate chocolate bars to fuel me. I drank whisky on rocks when the music was done but the people still didn't want to go home. Leah Abramson is my new favorite songbird and we had a mini tour to farmhouses and cabins. I hired a DJ for our closing party and we danced to Brazilian funk and hip-hop and it was a lovely get-down contrast to a few days of pin-drop quiet singer-songwriters. It is good to sing songs, and to listen to them. And then it is good to dance. Today I fly to Toronto. I will find myself some cuisine that I can't find in Halifax and I will try to go to bed early. Big city, schmig bitty. Then tomorrow morning I will wake up and board a plane with my best friend and we will fly on it to Cuba! Holy moly! I never take vacations. Like, ever. We have known each other for 20 years and this is our first trip. It's an anniversary celebration. Neither of us speak spanish. Neither of us are seasoned travellers. We do not have hotels booked. But we have a casa particulare for our first night and I have a desire to relinguish control. I've had a firm hold on it Or it on me. I like things to go right, i like them to go my way I am a leo. I like people to like me So i try to do everything right, all the time It is an obsession that has brought me to places like chronic indigestion and heart flutters Oops I am working on it. It is a work in progress. I would like to read some quotes about that or maybe I should write them... I know, rationally, that I don't have control and why should I want to? Life is amazing, it just happens, we don't have to do anything and it will still happen We don't even have to make our bodies breathe, they just do it for us! Of course, a few intentional deep breaths never hurt anyone So, tomorrow, I will land on a spanish, communist island with a small bag and no plans On an artist's budget. That means, um, very small. I expect some challenge and some tears and some adventure and some glee I want it to shake the control freak outta me If I had time I would tell you, blog, and you, people who are so wonderful as to actually read my blog, all about myself, this winter, my heady head but I have to bag my bags, there are things I can't forget! My passport, where is it? Little bottles that are allowed on airplanes and, for Cubans that I meet, some small gifts The world is big/small I am big/small, too I fit into it, after all and so do you. until next time, td Winter is here in Halifax. Just finished the www.inthedeadofwinter.com music festival. It was grand! I am one of the organizers, I guess you could say. I lack an official title though. I saw CR Avery make quiet a packed room with a poem about Pierre Elliot Trudeau. I heard Mary Gauthier speak on saturday afternoon about the craft of songwriting. I ate chocolate bars to fuel me. I drank whisky on rocks when the music was done but the people still didn't want to go home. Leah Abramson is my new favorite songbird and we had a mini tour to farmhouses and cabins. I hired a DJ for our closing party and we danced to Brazilian funk and hip-hop and it was a lovely get-down contrast to a few days of pin-drop quiet singer-songwriters. It is good to sing songs, and to listen to them. And then it is good to dance.

Today I fly to Toronto. I will find myself some cuisine that I can't find in Halifax and I will try to go to bed early. Big city, schmig bitty. Then tomorrow morning I will wake up and board a plane with my best friend and we will fly on it to Cuba! Holy moly! I never take vacations. Like, ever. We have known each other for 20 years and this is our first trip. It's an anniversary celebration. Neither of us speak spanish. Neither of us are seasoned travellers. We do not have hotels booked. But we have a casa particulare for our first night and I have a desire to relinguish control.

I've had a firm hold on it
Or it on me.
I like things to go right, i like them to go my way
I am a leo. I like people to like me
So i try to do everything right, all the time
It is an obsession that has brought me to places like chronic indigestion and heart flutters
Oops
I am working on it. It is a work in progress.
I would like to read some quotes about that
or maybe I should write them...

I know, rationally, that I don't have control
and why should I want to?
Life is amazing, it just happens, we don't have to do anything and it will still happen
We don't even have to make our bodies breathe, they just do it for us!
Of course, a few intentional deep breaths never hurt anyone

So, tomorrow, I will land on a spanish, communist island with a small bag and no plans
On an artist's budget. That means, um, very small.
I expect some challenge and some tears and some adventure and some glee
I want it to shake the control freak outta me

If I had time I would tell you, blog, and you, people who are so wonderful as to actually read my blog, all about myself, this winter, my heady head
but I have to bag my bags, there are things I can't forget!
My passport, where is it? Little bottles that are allowed on airplanes and, for Cubans that I meet, some small gifts

The world is big/small
I am big/small, too
I fit into it, after all
and so do you.

until next time,
td

]]> Sun, 30 Jan 2011 23:14:30 GMT 974C533AB642615A23C11737AC2B56E0 http://tanyadavis.ca/blog.cfm?feature=1831197&postid=696247 I am working on a poem with a deadline and so all I want is chocolate Or a hug or a shoulder rub or something to take my thoughts from it Deadlines are nice, they are like momentary bosses, But I am rebelling, this chair feels rigid, my bum wants off of it Poems don't write themselves though So... I gotta keep working. Several times this week I thought: what if I quit? what if I give this up and move to the hills become really good at making soup and seeking thrills and I mean slow thrills, like slow food, like snow falls and all I do is watch it Sounds kind of awesome Oh, but I would tire of that, too or moan and complain about my hard lot, all of my to-do's The thing is, life won't be easy thankfully, else I would whine about being bored but life could be simple, no matter poetry or other chores Take a breath and go forward But, really, if I finish this assignment on time will you come over and reward me? A massage for my hands that are cold and from this computer all narly Stories of what you do so I can leave my bubble, feel more a part of things Feel more hardy from a moment spent close to your heartstrings? Blogs are kinda like poems Futile, and yet important for reasons I don't know and I'm not much of an explorer and so I probably won't Not a lawyer, not a light heart with a good joke If my purpose is to connect words and let them out then I won't concern myself with what's the point, what's it about I took a break from a poem to write a poem, I think that has its own story to tell be well, td Or a hug or a shoulder rub or something to take my thoughts from it
Deadlines are nice, they are like momentary bosses,
But I am rebelling, this chair feels rigid, my bum wants off of it

Poems don't write themselves though
So... I gotta keep working.

Several times this week I thought:
what if I quit?
what if I give this up and move to the hills
become really good at making soup and seeking thrills
and I mean slow thrills, like slow food, like snow falls and all I do
is watch it
Sounds kind of awesome

Oh, but I would tire of that, too
or moan and complain about my hard lot, all of my to-do's

The thing is, life won't be easy
thankfully, else I would whine about being bored
but life could be simple, no matter poetry or other chores
Take a breath and go forward

But, really, if I finish this assignment on time will you come over and reward me?
A massage for my hands that are cold and from this computer all narly
Stories of what you do so I can leave my bubble, feel more a part of things
Feel more hardy from a moment spent close to your heartstrings?

Blogs are kinda like poems
Futile, and yet important
for reasons I don't know
and I'm not much of an explorer
and so I probably won't
Not a lawyer, not a light heart with a good joke

If my purpose is to connect words and let them out
then I won't concern myself with what's the point, what's it about
I took a break from a poem to write a poem, I think that has its own story to tell

be well,
td




]]> Thu, 13 Jan 2011 05:26:41 GMT F9F5D283C79BDB55C0393FDA30149676